A Dog’s Life

Adog’s Life

At the drop of a hat we use the phrase, “a dog’s life.”

When somebody asked, “So how is it going?” I would reply, “It has been a dog’s life.”All the while I never thought how a Dog’s life would be. Now when I think…I shudder. He would get up in the morning, i.e., if he were not run over by drunken lorry drivers, when he was sleeping on the road. No brushing of teeth or taking a bath. No prayers required.

He could go to the nearby tea-shop and stand there pleading some kind-looking soul. If he obliges, our Dog would have a biscuit to ward off the early morning hunger. For lunch, the Dog will go looking for a non-vegetarian hotel where they throw away the chicken or mutton waste out in the open. In India, there are many such hotels, and our protagonist has a good meal.

Of course, he has to use his survival instincts to beat the street-corner beggar who is also looking for some protein-rich diet. A fulfilled, yet thirsty Dog would go looking for drinking water. If it were a Chennai Dog, it is doomed. But thanks to the Public Works Department, the Dog will find bowls (read potholes) of rainwater on the road.

After a brief fight with other stray Dogs, ours hopefully wins and gets a drink.In the evening, the dog takes a trip to the butcher shop. When the butcher closes the shop, he throws away the day’s waste on the road. While the Dog mafia decides on what to do with the loot, if our Dog can reach there in time…he could have a bite. Just the right snack for a tiring day.

There is very little dinner involved in a Dog’s life. The sewer-water, which is difficult to identify in the dark is drunk. It is the Dog’s equivalent of a beer. And a tipsy Dog goes to bed…God knows on which road. Actually…come to think of it…it sounds like my life. Pleasing my bosses for a lone salty biscuit. Doing stuff that I don’t like doing for that odd piece of mutton, and trying to be in the good books of the mafia (my Girlfriend. I am having a Dog’s life. Or am I a Dog?